Pondering

This morning while making my breakfast smoothie, I was pondering my blog. Fitmom isn't really the best title anymore. My blog has become a place for me to talk about my allergies, parenting allergic teenage children, to blow off steam and to talk about my health goals. Yoga has helped me to let go of some unrealistic thoughts about myself, following the advice of my naturopath is helping me to heal from the inside out. And blogging about some of the other stuff in my life is helping me to process and deal, without stress eating, without being angry (ok, less angry) and give my mind a rest. So although I'm not sure the title is the best one, I'm going to continue the way I have been.

What's been going on lately:
1. Finished report cards. Whew. They are emotionally draining to write, I hate putting an evaluation of a kid on paper. I wish that all of the parents of my students knew how much it pains me to tell the absolute truth as I see it.
2. Finished my AQ course. I miss it already. I have come to the conclusion that I absolutely do have a sickness, I cannot be idle. It drives me nuts and I eat junk I shouldn't. Luckily the next course starts on July 4th.
3. Spent my weekend at a lacrosse tournament watching my youngest, Seamus, play some awesome box lacrosse. He's a big fan of hearing his Mommy screaming, "Go Shimmy go!" when he's on a breakaway. I'm sure his nickname makes others wonder about us. But Seamus means James in Irish, and when he was a baby his dad joking called him Shimmy. And it stuck. But I digress--the Shimster (and his older brother) is the athlete I wish I could be. If I had played box lacrosse and could have cross-checked, hit people with my stick, plowed right over people, as a child I'd likely have a lot less issues today. And he's not just good at lacrosse.
4. Only a week left of school. The kids are done, I'm done, and it's time for a well-deserved break. It feels more like crowd control than teaching these days. Which means it's time for it to be over.
5. I mentioned in an earlier post about someone dear to me who has been having health issues. I'm thrilled to say that it's not nearly as serious as initially thought. Thank God! And thank you to all of my friends who pray for my loved ones and I. I am truly blessed.
6. I'm reading a book called "Crazy Love" and trying to make it to a small group about the book at our church. So far I'm reading, but not getting to small group. Tomorrow. I will go tomorrow.
7. Parenting teenagers is by far the scariest, most harrowing thing I've ever experienced. My teenagers are experiencing growing pains, and dealing with difficult things and literally all I can do is be open to them and keep praying. It's difficult dealing with the secrecy that is a part of teenage culture. Kids keep secrets when they should tell, and they just don't have the skills to deal with all of the crap in their lives. I want to hold them close and keep them safe, but I have to let them grow and learn and be independent thinkers and people. My head tells me it's the right thing to do, but my heart wants to hold on so tight that I'd smother them. I miss the toddler years, when I could largely control their environment. And keep them safe. And the kind of social issues we were dealing with was a friend who called someone a stupid poopyhead.

And that my friends is my life in a nutshell. I can't wait until it's summer vacation and I might actually relax a little. Reading a good book on the beach, Shim playing in the water all day, the older 2 reading on the beach with me. Of course they'll have ipods in their ears and won't want to talk, but they'll be safe with me.

Namaste.