Monday, November 21, 2011

a pain-free day!

I had a pain-free day today!  And even though I'm dying to get moving, I am going to give my self a couple more days before I run.  I will go to Hatha yoga tomorrow, it's so gentle I should be fine.  And I will LISTEN to my body.  Not listening is what got me into this mess.  Well, that and being pregant 20 years ago, and not knowing that you should always draw your knees into your chest to sneeze when your belly is already straining all of those muscles, tendons and ligaments.  I really didn't think that the injury would still be rearing its ugly head, all these years later.  And I guess that it wouldn't be, if I had the good sense to listen when my body says enough.  Sadly, I am a slow learner when it comes to these things.

I've restarted my detox diet.  My dietary negligence is apparent in a few not so nice ways.  Time to get real.  I don't know why I'm struggling so much lately.  Stress?  The research shows that stress impacts hormones, and starts a nasty vicious cycle of cravings, weight gain, which in turn impacts the hormones...and the cycle perpetuates itself.  Nice.  Or not.  Either way, time to get my head out of my butt and pay attention to what I'm doing to myself.  Lots of water, liver detoxifying foods and of course my supplements.  Too much estrogen rampaging through my system is causing mayhem.  Time to throw in a little extra ground flax too.  The key is to manage to get through the first couple of weeks and then you start to feel better.  I`m all for feeling better!

Enough blogging, I have to write a huge IEP (that`s boring teacher talk.  If you don`t know what it means, don`t worry about it!), for a fake kid, filled with fake details, to satisfy a requirement of my course.  It is a valuable exercise in many respects, but I tired of doing this much work for fake kids.  I have enough work to do to appropriately program for real kids.  But, alas it must be done.  And since I`m resting my sore iliopsoas, it`s good to get it out of the way.

Stay tuned for a running blog post!  I`m hoping for maybe Thursday or Friday--it will be painful, but I will be running!  

Friday, November 18, 2011

injury begone!

Dear Injury,
You are preventing me from running and yoga-ing it up.  I am tired of this clingy attitude you've adopted.  It's time for you to move on.  Please leave.  I am missing a beautiful outside run day (with a scarf wrapped around my face to warm the cold air before it hits my lungs) because you are outstaying your welcome.  I dream of a pain-free run followed by a nice long stretch.  And you are in my way.
Injury, I no longer give you permission to occupy my body.  If this persists I will be forced to take significant action.

This is my letter to my nagging pain.  I have resorted to watching bootcamp videos on youtube and surfing Yoga and, which is like a sex addict watching online porn.  (ok, I totally made that line up, I like the way it sounds--kinda creepy)  I'm reading the blogs of my fit friends, green with envy.  I'm perusing the Running Free website, jones-ing over some new flashy runners.  You know, the kind that make you look fast.  I'm watching my waist, which in my warped mind, I'm sure I can see expanding even as I type this.

I'm rereading this blog post and realizing that I actually am a crazy person, who only pretends to be sane.  But I'm happy this way!  Even though it's apparent that I either need to go on a very long run, or need to seek intensive psychotherapy.  Maybe both.  My sister has been a therapy provider, I'll ask her what she thinks.  I'm sure she'll agree.

It's been a full week without physical activity.  And I'm still not healed.  I know I can't run until the pain is gone, or I will just be back to the start.  This is getting ridiculous!  I need some perspective.  It's been a crazy week, and realistically I could only have  worked some kind of exercise in on a couple of days.  I've missed 3 runs tops.  Only 2 yoga classes, and one of those was because of work.  Maybe tomorrow I'll try a very short, very easy run.  Or at least a walk.  And some yoga asana that doesn't involve my hip and groin region.
Brooks Racer ST 5 Unisex Blaze/Navy/SilverNB WR1063CU Women's Orange/White/SilverNB WT10GR Women's Grey/RedRun:Your Heart Out Pullover

 These are just some of the things I've decided that will make my injury feel better.  Or maybe it's my Christmas list.  Either way, it's kind of sad that this is what I've been reduced to.  Shoe photos courtesy of Running Free Orangeville (shout out to Norm and Jodi!) and the rest from lululemon. 

I think any of the shoes would make me look fast, don't you?

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Injuries bite

Remember that slightly strained hip flexor I was complaining about?  It's still got me sidelined.  It's a week today.  I am not impressed.  And I believe it is actually an iliopsoas injury.  You know how I first injured it and have had trouble ever since?  I sneezed when I was pregnant.  With Jess.  Who is now 19 & 1/2 years old.  That's a long time to keep having a recurring injury.

I think I really strained it this time.  Usually a couple days rest and I'm good to go again.  Never a week!  I'm trying so hard to be patient, I really am.  But I'm itching to get my running shoes on.  I'm thinking I'm going to be very set back in my running.  Not as worried about yoga.  But, I will wait, all in the name of healing.

It serves me right, I guess.  I need to learn not to push.  It's ok.

And in typical fashion, I am getting a cold on the day of parent-teacher interviews.  It's like a tradition.  At least I'm getting a two-fer.  I have to rest and not run anyway, hopefully the worst of the cold will be over by the time I'm ready to run again.

Tomorrow we get a half day off, because we work this evening.  I do believe I'm going to call the naturopath and see if I can get my B12, immune booster and a vitamin C iv tomorrow afternoon.  And maybe a manicure.  Because there's no way I'm wasting a precious 1/2 day off!

And maybe, just maybe, I'll call and make an appointment with a physiotherapist.  I would love to kick this injury once and for all!

Happy Thursday.  Learn from my mistakes--listen to your body!

Saturday, November 12, 2011

vinyasa hangover

I went to my first vinyasa class in many moons on Thursday evening.  The lovely Sarah is back.  The class is at the home studio of Joey and Ellen who own Soaring Heart Wellness in Shelburne.  It is AMAZING!  They live in a circular home (that I first saw about 15 years ago, and yes, I covet it).  I didn't know that's where they lived until I got there.  Anyhow, I digress.  The studio is an amazing space, heated by woodstove.  I actually made a Bikram joke when I got there, it was HOT.  But hot is fantastic for creaky, middle-aged muscles.  As Sarah said, a gift.  Suffice it to say that I was immediately in detox mode, and drank water and peed constantly yesterday (that's alot of info.  Sorry.)

Practice was wonderful.  I was brought back into my yoga groove, so to speak.  As we flowed (it is vinyasa!) through asana, I could feel my body waking up in a way that it has been missing.  Some imbalances were readily apparent to me, some were only discovered yesterday as I found some muscles that were clearly challenged the evening before.  And this morning the vinyasa hangover continues--hello triceps, nice (?!) to feel you again.  Oh, hello left hamstring, right hip flexor, sorry for the "argument".  Please relax and take it a little easy today. 

So while I've enjoyed my Hatha practice with Willowcreek Yoga, and it's kept me fairly limber, I am a vinyasa yogini.  For reals.  I thank Hatha for allowing me to move back into vinyasa, with a certain amount of success.  I was very happy to find that I haven't lost much flexibility.  I can still do a foward fold with kubera mudra (which is likely not spelled correctly, Sanskrit in not my first language.  Or second for that matter.)  I can still grasp my feet in a seated forward fold.  King pigeon and sleeping pigeon are still accessible (although a little tighter).  Twists are accessible and will only get better.

Yes, I still have vinyasa hangover, but it's the best kind of hangover.  I will drink lots of water with lemon today, rest my twingy hamstring and hip flexor, and do a long run tomorrow.  Tomorrow's run should be better, looser hip joints, lengthened hamstrings will make it flow.  Thank you vinyasa.

And something else I discovered as a truth for me?  I love class.  I don't do so well with home practice.  And although I am introspective by nature, I much prefer that introspection while within a group of like-minded people.  Weird.  I was genuinely happy to see everyone.  It was a combination of people from Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays, from the last few series of classes.  I knew everyone, except one newcomer.  And I realized that although yoga is the only place we see each other, we are a community.

Enjoy this chilly Saturday.  The snow will likely melt, and it may well be our last Ontario Saturday before the real onset of winter.


Sunday, November 6, 2011


Today is a fabulous day!  I started out feeling a bit sad (?? not sure why!).  But Rick and I went to church, and it was the kids service.  The kids of the church did the whole service, and boy do their praise songs rock!  They did a dramatic reading of the Prodigal Son story, and danced and sang.  It changed my sadness into gratefulness that I dragged my butt out and went.

I am also grateful for a new coffeemaker (I killed the old one, note to self, do the vinegar trick more than once a year).  But most of all I am grateful for a beautiful, warm November day.  My backdoor is open, letting beautiful fresh air in.  The sunshine is amazing, and Rick and I did a little cleaning up in the backyard.  It was glorious! 

The extra hour today because of the time change is oh, so lovely.  I love how it makes a beautiful Sunday feel almost neverending!  A little sunshine does wonders for mood and sense of wellbeing.  It brings out the neighbours, and makes the dog excited to be in the backyard with me.

Ultimately, I have a great deal for which to be thankful.  And grateful.  And I am doing just that on this beautiful, sunny Sunday.

Saturday, November 5, 2011

What couple of weeks!

It's been a while, holy moly, what a couple of weeks!  Hanging on by a thread would pretty much describe it.   Not enough exercise, too much work, and too much stress.  Taking a demanding course and writing progress reports for school, coupled with getting boys to sports makes me a bit of a crazy woman!  Complete with crying when my hubs didn't make family breakfast last weekend.  Crying.  Yup, it wasn't a good day.  Not a good week.  Fighting tears at school, over the silliest little things.  But my final assignments for this module of the course are done, progress reports are done, except for some editing and revising.  I did take a day off work to get it all done and regain some sense of sanity and grip on reality.  The good news is that I feel much more like myself.  And I'm sure everyone around me is glad.

Which brings me to question how perfectionism affects lives.  My biggest stressor is--me!  The amount of pressure I put on myself to be perfect is ridiculous.  No one is harder on me than me.  It's unhealthy.  I'm not eating well, I'm no doubt taking years off of my life with worry and anxiety and I'm just not nice to be around.  I see it in my children, and I see it in my friends.  I can help to put things in perspective for others, why not myself?  Yes, perfectionism gets me ahead in my career.  But at what cost?

So my conclusion is that the cost of perfectionism can be huge.  Perfectionism is not actually something to strive for--it's something to try to avoid.  No one can be perfect at everything.  That is not how humans are designed. 

I frequently lament my slowness when running.  My stalled progress in my yoga practice (or intermittent practice!).  My frailities of spirit.  My inability to be everything to everyone.  But I'm reminding myself today that all of those are okay.  There is time, and I need to enjoy the journey.  I may never be perfect--in fact I'm sure of it.  There has only ever been one perfect human being.  And I'm definitely not in His league!

My friends, my message today is simple.  Don't try to be perfect.  Let it go.  Just be.  Take time to enjoy the small things.  Today I will run, I'm aiming for 8 & 1/2 to 9km.  It will be painful at times, but it's a beautiful sunny day and I am going to concentrate on enjoying the day for what it is.

I'm dedicating my thoughts and prayers to my friend Julie today.  I love you Julie!  I know that you will read this blog post, because you always do.  Know that I`m thinking of you today and always.