Wednesday, December 21, 2011

20 years is a long time

Today, on the winter solstice is the 20th anniversary of my marriage to my husband.  20 years!  That's long time, no matter how you count it.  In human years, dog years, or married years 20 is a big number.  It has been an eventful 20 years.  Lots of laughing, crying and sometimes even yelling.  Ok, maybe a fair bit of yelling, but mostly in the first 10 years.  You know, when we were raising young kids, suffering from sleep deprivation and a severe lack of funds.  But we got through it in one piece, and I would even go back and do it all over again.

We have 3 wonderful children, and on August 8th every year we ponder what would have been.  We have been married almost as long as we weren't!  In 2 short years I will have been married as long as I wasn't.  How many of my generation can say that?  And all to the same man.  How do you quantify what another means to you?  We can count it in years.  But how do you express that our lives are so intertwined and woven together that I'm not sure where I end and he begins. 

Sometimes marriage is like a favourite sweater.  You look forward to snuggling up in it after a long hard day out in the world, sometimes you think it needs some mending, and on other days you think it stinks and needs a good wash.  But like an old sweater that you love, you dig it out and put it on and revel in the comfort.  There's no itchy tags to contend with, no pretence, and frankly if there's a spill, you know you can deal with it.

I suppose having been married for 20 years officially puts us in the old people club.  Who has been married 20 years, except someone's parents?  I consider the enthusiasm of the newly married with some envy.  But I still prefer the comfort of my old marriage.  The wrinkles have been worked out, we finish each other's sentences and he knows what I'm thinking before I think it.

This morning on facebook my husband asked if I was up for another 20 years.  He can count on it.  I'm in if he's in, I can't imagine it any other way.

I'm not the most demonstrative of people, PDA makes my skin kind of crawl.  So he will know what a huge deal it is for me to tell him how much I love him on my blog.  This is major people!

Happy anniversary honey, I do love you and I'm looking forward to the next 20 years.

By the way, I highly recommend getting married on the solstice.  It seems to work :)

No comments: