stress hormones much?

This is a post purely about parenting and the resulting stress hormones. If posts about the progeny of others isn't your thing, you may wish to not read on.

Yesterday morning at school was wonderful. We were dying Easter eggs (serious Gr. 4 fun) and exploring the wonders of powerpoint, they were creating slides and learning about it. Wonderful. At noon, I finally got the chance to check my board email and read the email that was sent at 9:30 to inform me that my 12 year old was not at school. He was supposed to be at school, he was ready when I left and only had to walk to his bus stop at the end of the street. I thought perhaps he had missed the bus and was still at home. Called home. No answer. Spent the next hour calling home from the school phone, and even tried with my cell phone (outside in the freezing parking lot) in case he was afraid of getting in trouble with his school (all phone calls from the school have the school board identification for caller id and he wouldn't know which school was calling). I went outside with my blackberry to send a message on Facebook. He hadn't been on Facebook all morning. Starting to panic. Called school, finally got a hold of the principal to let him know Kiddo was supposed to be at school, he's not at home, could they check to see if it was a mistake on the attendance. My stress hormones are through the roof at this point, it's been hours since anyone knew where he was. I texted hubs at work, he left and headed home and checked all of the friends houses in the neighbourhood where Seamus might have gone. I'm in serious panic mode at this point. It is not like my child to not let us know where he is, and even if he hadn't gone to school he would have called me to tell me. All of the parents who are reading this know exactly how I'm feeling and the awful images going through my head at this point. Hubs finally gets a hold of the school again, and is told that it was a supply teacher who had made a mistake and he was at the tech centre all along. So relieved. Fall apart and sob at desk, thankfully my students were outside for recess. Mistakes happen, but parents need a phone call at the beginning of the day to ensure child safety. If I had received a phone call at the beginning of the day, the whole mess could have been resolved quickly, and the mistake could have been discovered. And the panic would have been averted. Seamus' school found out that I'm like a jack russell, yappy and hyper and jump the gun, but dealing with his dad is far worse. He's more quiet but when he lets loose, look out. Much more like the dogs Brazilians use to hunt and kill jaguar. Quiet and deadly. I'm guessing they'd rather deal with the jack russell.

So a couple of pomtinis later last night, I started to calm down. Extra B complex vitamins and magnesium today to try to counteract the stress. Probably a B12 shot next week would be in order too. And yoga. Lots of yoga.

It's been that kind of couple of weeks. A week ago university bound daughter was laid off from kick-ass job that was going to pay for her first 2 years of uni. Had to help her to decide where to accept so she wouldn't lose her entrance scholarships. Too much stress. Daughter still looking for job to help to pay tuition and res.

So grateful for the extra long weekend to gear up for the next few weeks. Amazed and awed by the reason we have a long weekend. No doubt will get over emotional at Easter church services. I usually do, however after the stress lately, emotions are already running high and tears are much closer to the surface than usual. Looking forward to spending time with my siblings and nephews. Gotta love family.

Wishing everyone a Happy Easter, peace and love and zero stress. Especially of the misplaced child variety.

feeling consumed by guilt and yet relief

As I mentioned before, for some insane reason, it seemed like a really good time to take a course. Suffice it to say--maybe not?! I was busy before, now I am consumed. Although I have school stuff I should be doing, and course work that I could be doing, I'm taking the night off. Totally. I'm going to yoga, and I'm not even going to work before I go. I know--rebel. Of course, I'm consumed with guilt, but at the same time feeling mighty relieved! I've been exhausted lately, and the non-stop schedule is totally to blame. So tonight is work-free and I'm yoga-ing it up. Maybe yoga will help get the kinks out of my back and neck, and focusing on the breath will be a lovely change from focusing on everything else. And hubs is taking the Shimster to his extra basketball practice tonight. Sweet. Namaste--I really mean it!

Good news!

I had a visit with my naturopath yesterday, and I apparently am in good health. All of the reasons I went to her in the first place are pretty much resolved, and I am now just touching base with her as a follow-up. Nice! My allergies are much better, and now that I know staying strict with my allergen-free diet really helps, it makes sticking to it easier. I am exhausted today, it's been a tiring couple of weeks. But Lia wants me to add more exercise back in, and since life should start to be a little more reasonable in about a week, I'll be good to go! One more insane week, but luckily hubs is on days next week and will be available to help with all of the getting kids where they need to be. I am grateful to get to stay home tonight. I started the course I mentioned previously, so that is taking up some of my time. But it's fascinating and I'm sure it will be well worth the effort. I'll be getting up a bit early every day to work on it, or to fit in weights or a run. It's all about being organized, right? Have a wonderful weekend, mes amis.

blahs

Life has gotten away on me again. I am feeling stressed and overwhelmed. It's too busy and I'm not getting enough exercise. I made the decision to skip the running clinic. It's just one more thing in an already overcrowded life. I would like to walk away and leave my life behind for a few weeks. A beach, a pile of books, nowhere to have to be, and no one to answer to. Yoga when I feel like it, swimming and running when I feel like it, but all on my own time. Sounds divine doesn't it? The blahs will pass, this I know. The real issue is figuring how to plan my life so that I don't get to this. I'm not big into feeling weepy and overwhelmed, that's not how I usually roll, but that seems to be par for the course over the past few weeks. And it's not work. Work is the one place I feel like myself. *sigh* I had my B12 shot today. Maybe that will help.

I love sunny Saturdays

Sunshine streaming in the studio windows was so wonderful at yoga this morning. Absolutely divine. I choose my spot closest to the windows, and with the morning sun shining, I felt great! It is a *brisk* day in Ontario, but the warmth of the sun is increasing every day. A truly joyful practice today, after a crap practice on Tuesday. I was exhausted on Tuesday, but with a good night's sleep, morning practice was just the thing today. It's funny how you feeling truly does affect your practice.



Interestingly, I had a dream last night about the lovely Sarah (yoga teacher extraordinaire) trying to develop a class at the gym I used to go to in Orangeville. I was rushing in to get a good spot, and had to stop to speak with Rob (the psycho trainer). I congratulated him on becoming the new manager of the gym (he is, I got an email a couple of weeks ago), and gave him a huge hug. It was an entirely too friendly hug, really nothing like the kind of relationship I have EVER had with him. Weird. And even though he shaves his head and is buff and pumped beyond belief, he was skinnier and had hair. Double weird.



When I told my son Jackson about the dream, his response was that I must be supposed to go back to Rob as my trainer, and start working with weights again. Now, I have been considering weight training again, I do miss it, and it does wonders for muscle definition and fat burning potential. I have really missed Rob and his workouts (ok, he kicks my ass, but he is funny and cruel at the same time!), but I don't want to go to O'ville to the gym. It doesn't fit very well in my life right now. But I do miss kickboxing especially. And I do miss Rob. What to do, what to do?! I don't want to undo all of the good joint loosening work I've done with yoga. I do want to kick up the fat burning. I don't however think there will be alot of hugging of Rob going on. And I still don't know what Rob being skinnier and with hair has to do with anything!

I'm looking forward to a nice long walk with the pup and hubs later on today. And the running clinic starts Wednesday. Hopefully I can work out how I'm going to get there, and get Seamus to basketball practice. There's always something :)

Have a wonderful sunny Saturday. I'm going to try to find the yoga in housework...
Namaste.

back to the grind

March break flew by! Yesterday was the first day back to school, and I'm exhausted already. Is it the getting up, showered and dressed (big effort compared to last week!), and then spending the day at school that's got me tired? Is it the planning for a supply teacher for today and tomorrow because I'm back at the board office working on the huge math assessment again? I don't know. I do know that the kids were wacky (especially the class I teach French to!), my own kids were grumpy and tired last night, and waking up with a headache is never a good sign.

But there are a lot of things for which to be grateful:

1. Jess got her acceptance letter for Wilfred Laurier University. So now she can choose where she goes (and likely partly explains why she was freaked out last night), and has an entrance scholarship at Laurier and Lakehead. Hard work does pay off!
2. Yoga tonight. It has become such an important part of my life and I am soooo excited before class! Like a kid going to Disney. And that's a good thing.
3. Compliments about my kiddos. Really. When supply or student teachers find out who your kids are, and have glowing compliments about their behaviour and smarts, it feels great. Maybe I'm not doing a bad job after all!
4. Good friends. People (at work and outside of work) who I enjoy spending time with, and enjoy my company as well. I am truly blessed.
5. Supportive family and spouse. They see me at my absolute worst, and pick me up and brush me off when I need it. They also share my great joys. Again I'm truly blessed.
6. Living in a country where women have as many opportunities for education and career advancement as men. I'm always working toward the next step (can you say driven?!), and although I sometimes drive myself crazy, I know how lucky I am. I cannot imagine not having an education, or not having the opportunity to have a wonderful career. I can only imagine what a miserable *creature* I would be to live with then!

So while I do a lot of grumbling and complaining, I know I am very lucky. I have a wonderful life, filled with blessings. I love my family, I love my friends, I love my class.

If you are reading this, then there's a good chance you are one of the wonderful family or friends that I mentioned above. Thanks!

Have a wonderful Tuesday :)

walk the walk?

On Wednesday, Jackson had an appt with his acne dr in Yorkville (not a city gal, but I love Yorkville!). Most recent course of topical therapy hasn't been terribly effective, and Dr B wants us to consider Accutane. Accutane is a scary sounding drug! I've done some research, and I feel the possible side effects are too scary to even consider letting my baby take it. Wreck your liver or colon, just to get rid of acne??? Seems ridiculous to even consider it. Now having said all of that, I have been wanting the kiddos to visit my fabulous ND, Lia, for some time now. I broached the topic with J this a.m., and he's not terribly thrilled with the prospect of giving up wheat/sugar/dairy, which I think will likely be the first course of action she prescribes. BUT, I have had such incredible success with the therapies she has me on, that I think it's worth a try. And I mean really great success. Without being too graphic, I don't give Lady MacBeth a run for her money anymore...ok, I borrowed that line from Marian Keyes, but it fits :)

Then I read an eco-blog I follow about being "eco" at work, and the comment was made about "walking the walk, not just talking the talk." And I realized that if I let my precious child take a potentially dangerous drug, when I won't even take ibuprophen anymore, then I am not practising what I preach. Up until now, I haven't *inflicted* my lifestyle and health choices too much on my kiddos, but maybe it's time. I want them to be as healthy as possible. And on another more selfish note, if they are following the same diet, then there won't be stuff I can't eat in the house either. And as an additional selling point--it will likely enhance their athletic abilities as well. It would be awesome for Blake Griffin to come out and endorse naturopathy, that would so help my cause! (for the uninitiated, Blake is the hottest rookie in the NBA this year, was drafted last year, but missed the season due to injury, spent the healing time training his *smokin' hot* bod, and has taken the league by storm) Or Georges St-Pierre (you know, GSP from the UFC...Whew, is it warm in here?? lol)

So, in my own convoluted way, I am trying to say that I need to walk the walk, not just talk the talk. And that needs to start at home. It's time for me to be a little more persistent with my own family, get them on the walk too.

Speaking of walking, took my Chasey-pup for a lovely, sunny 5k walk yesterday. She needs a little help walkin' the walk too, she's a little *plumper* than she's ever been. (winter doldrums, you know) What a glorious, sunny springy day! Nothing beats walking with your bestie, sunshine on your face! Not so much sun here in Dundalk today, but I have hope, it is coming! Spring is on the way....

Have a glorious Friday...