One reason Canadian summer is too short

My summer just started.  I finished work on Friday, and will have six glorious weeks of summer before returning to school all refreshed and able to cope with other people's children.  Believe me, educators need to recharge over summer.  Most kids are great, some would try the patience of Mother Teresa (oh wait, that might be my own children I'm speaking of.....message remains the same....). But I digress.....so, while I'm enjoying catching up all of the housework I didn't do for the past, oh let's say 9 months, I check my email.  And my inbox is full of emails about back to school sales, uniforms, backpacks and other school accoutrements that parents get suckered into buying.  It's the second week of July for crying out loud.  What kind of an asshat is thinking about back to school already?  (Sorry Pinterest friends who are madly pinning BTS crap....stop planning for a couple of weeks already!).  We live in a ridiculously material, consumerist society.  It is summer.  Time for beaches and decks and hanging out with friends.  Camping, cottaging, enjoying nature, hiking, lakes, canoeing.  You know Canadian summer things.  Not advertisements for crap kids don't actually need for school, that were no doubt manufactured in an Asian sweatshop.  First world problem I know.  But I live in the first world, and my crazy life makes me sick and I need to recharge without worrying about BTS.

So when I summon enough energy to unsubscribe to those retailers (online shopping is wonderful, and yet this is the result), that's what I will do.  In the meantime, don't email my sympatico account, I'm not reading those ones.  

In other news, when cleaning my grubby house, I took the chocolate brown curtains down to be washed.  And rediscovered the lovely bright airiness of my downstairs.  I don't think I'm putting them back up.  I did foray to Target a week ago to see if they had any lighter curtains, they didn't have what I was looking for.  Although I'm not sure the orange and white chevron I'm envisioning in my head is available anywhere.  Maybe I can talk Rick into coming to Ikea with me.  I live in a subdivision so no curtains isn't really an option, I need some kind of window coverings.  Ikea might be my best bet.  Cheap.  Or I might need to stoop to actually sewing some.  I think it's safe to say that is not really the best option.  Sewing raises my blood pressure to near stroke levels.  Fingers crossed that somewhere will have just what I'm looking for.

I've also decided this morning that I need to buy a "vintage" trailer to redo, and then put on a lake somewhere on a seasonal site.  Vintage really means old.  But made to look adorable with paint and imagination.  Look on Pinterest.  You'll see what I'm talking about.  Has to be a trailer, Rick won't go tent camping anymore.  I say Rick, but what I really mean is that we are too old and decrepit to get up off the ground in the morning when we sleep in tents.  For real.  But the real deal is that I need to be in nature.  Near water.  Nothing soothes the soul or lowers blood pressure like looking out at the lake in the early morning.  

Lunch with my sister and nephews today, meaning I need to kick my butt into gear so I get there on time.  Enjoy summer friends, it's too fleeting to be thinking about fall yet.

Quiet days

Summer vacation has finally arrived, and with it the bliss of quiet days.  Time to reflect, meditate, practise yoga and simplify.  A new doctor who suggests that fibromyalgia is a part of the puzzle of my health has given me lots to ponder.  Apparently it's not normal to ache everyday and to have trouble climbing out of bed because of stiffness and non-restorative sleep.  I don't know why I never suspected that in my quest for answers as to why I feel like crap a lot of the time.  But I didn't.  It's given me a huge kick in the butt.  I'm in my early forties, and some days feel 80.  I don't have time to feel like that.  I have too much to accomplish.  So I am actually taking my own advice and working on simplifying and finding balance.  It's my hope that it will just be habit by the time I go back to work in six weeks.  Six glorious weeks of summer.  It will fly by and before I know it I will be making plans to return to my office, and get ready for the onslaught of children after labour day.  Until then you can find me taking it easy.

Breathe......

I can feel it coming.  I'm starting to be able to breathe again.  Literally.  I think I've been breathing shallow, shallow breaths for so long that I didn't realize it had once again become a habit.  I wasn't so tired I felt nauseous today.  Still tired, but not bone achy nauseous kind of tired.  Today was kind of wild, but I could handle it.  A few days ago I would have been able to feel the panic rising up into my throat.  One more stressor that was going to put me over the edge.  

Oh, I had my meltdown on Sunday.  The kind of dissolving into weeping that is sometimes just what you need to break free of the stress.  To be able to get up and move on.  You know, the despair that nearly sends husbands into full on panic.  If SHE is melting down like this, what the heck am I going to do?  The right answer of course is to pour a beverage of choice (tea, wine, diet coke) and offer to punch the creep that tipped her over the edge in the throat.  The ridiculousness of that statement usually snaps me out of my state.  Even though I could never condone violence.

Except when it comes to sports.  As I said before, my son has started playing rugby.  Which ranks only slightly behind lacrosse in my enjoyment as a spectator.  As soon as I can figure out all of the ref hand signals, I will enjoy it fully.  Huge, hulking men throwing each other on the ground, piling up, shoving?  I'm in.  We went to see the Canada vs Ireland rugby game on Saturday night.  Because said son has the broken ankle, we got seats in the accessible section, because was in a wheelchair to get into the BMO Centre.  We sat right behind the Irish bench.  We could hear them talking.  It was amazing.  I am officially a Team Ireland fan, and loved every single minute of it.  I am buying tickets for both the Canada vs USA game and the All Blacks vs Canada.  Even if I end up going myself.  No number 19, Mike McCarthy (lock for Ireland), but it's rugby!  I can't wait.  Btw, if you PVRed the game Saturday, on TSN, you can see the back of my head in some shots.  From far away.  I'm going to watch to see if you can actually see our faces at any point.  Never something I thought I would ever do.  Seriously?  TSN?  Weird.  My only wish is that more lacrosse and rugby would be televised.  Because I relieve my aggression vicariously through it.

A few more days, and then sweet freedom.  Lots of time on the deck and at the beach.  Studying referee hand signals :)

Glad the week is over....

In the drama that I call life, it's been quite week.  First our Miss Kitty (and we miss her so much!), then Seamus breaking his ankle at rugby.  And that was quite a roller coaster ride!  First told he needed surgery to put screws in, then he didn't, but has a cast.  Crap weather, snow on my newly planted plants.  I was glad when the week was over.  This weekend is a course weekend, which isn't great, but the end is in sight. 

Unfortunately I accidentally ate a teensy bit of gluten yesterday, because I didn't read a label.  Dumb.  So today my stomach feels like I drank battery acid and then scrubbed it with a wire brush.  Not pleasant.  I only had a mouthful, I can't imagine a whole bunch!   Lesson learned, don't absently mindedly eat stuff without label reading.  My mistake, I've only myself to blame.

Found a new massage therapist down the street from school, who I really liked.  She worked on my blasted IT bands.  She asked if the right side was especially painful, because it was REALLY tight.  Yes, yes it was/is.  Hoping everything I'm doing for it heals it up quickly!

Allistair planning his escape.  Now that he's an only kitty, he's even more determined to go everywhere with the dog.  The birds don't know how lucky they are!  And he has no idea that the coyotes will eat him if I let him out.  He's also loving Seamus, giving him lots of cuddles and loud purring.  Funny for a cat that really is a one person creature.  I guess broken bones need kitty love to heal, in his opinion!

Jasmine

Yesterday was a sad day at our house. Our beautiful almost seventeen year old kitty Jasmine had to be put to sleep. She was my daughter's cat, a little orange fluffball, named Jasmine after the Aladdin character. Because that's what four year old little girls do.

We've had her since Jess was four and Jackson was nine months. We had her longer than we had Seamus. She will be missed.

She's not the first pet I've had to make the hardest decision for, and she won't be the last. But I swear that when you love pets the way I do, a little piece of my soul never recovers. Other animal lovers will understand exactly what I mean.

For first time in many years we are a two pet family. One dog, one cat. It's weird.

And now we heal. Today will be a better day.

Weirdo magnet part 2 and some other stuff

So, remember how I wrote a post not long ago about being a weirdo magnet? It keeps happening. I've received two more friend requests from men, and of course both profiles are a little sketchy. One is a "soldier for hire" and claims to work for a paramilitary organization in Afghanistan. But lives in Jamaica. He was clever enough to have a couple of pictures of him with a kid, and says he a widower. The one I got last night is from a handsome (who'd you steal that picture from?) man from Barcelona, but living in Maryland. He speaks English and "spainish". Of course he does. Because a native Spanish speaker would undoubtedly spell it that way. I've come to the conclusion that my profile pic must make me look really naive/desperate, and that the friends of my friends are making some poor choices of who they are friending on Facebook. And apparently "married" means nothing. I've also come to the conclusion that Manchester and Maryland are common choices for scammers to say they live. If they told me they live in Anchorage I might believe they are real people. Not really. I'm still a little concerned that somewhere in fbland my profile is linked to a porn site or something. Or a middle-aged ladies looking for younger handsome men dating site. Either way, if you find out I am, let me know!

In other news, I'm learning to overcome my deep seated distrust and disdain for mainstream medical doctors. I have found a good one. I'm getting better care than I have in 20 years, with the exception of the fantastic care I always get from my naturopath. He actually wants to find the root cause of the symptoms I have and takes me seriously. The look on his face when he asks questions about my history and finds out I've been asking the same questions since I became an adult is priceless. He will never say it, but it's evident he doesn't think I've gotten very good care in the past. Which is unfortunate, but I'm grateful that I'm getting it now. Not much wonder he's so busy and is always running behind with his appointments. I hope he never leaves my community!

I'm ever grateful for long weekends, and the chance to get caught up-- with sleep, housework and projects for my course (which is almost over, hallelujah!). A little gardening is in order, date night with my love and time just vegging out and getting ready to face the next few very busy weeks at school. I might even do some yoga. And of course the exercises I've been given for my knee.

Whatever you're doing this long weekend, enjoy. Garage sales, gardening, opening cottages and trailers, it's all good.

Much love.

10 Things

My blog friend Eco Yogini wrote an awesome blog post yesterday. You can read it here

http://ecoyogini.blogspot.ca/2013/05/10-things-you-need-to-tell-yourself-big.html

and in it she challenges us to write 10 things you love about your self---your non-physical self. She also asks us to tell 3 friends something you love about them. Let me just start by saying that she is an inspiring woman, her passion for the environment, her Acadian heritage and her work as a speech pathologist are a pleasure to read about. And I love when she writes about yoga too.

So......here goes. 10 things I love about me:

1. My ability to form relationships with children, as an educator. My office isn't where you go when you're in trouble, it's a safe place to talk to a caring adult.

2. My passion for all things education, especially improving student achievement.

3. My cognitive ability. Like the way my brain works.

4. The way I've never met a dog that didn't love me. Or cat for that matter.

5. My off-beat sense of humour. It's been a little hidden lately, but I love laughing. And making people laugh.

6. My practical, get things done nature. I am the antithesis of a procrastinator. Works for me.

7. My creativity. I have an artsy side, I enjoy creating.

8. My passion for equity. Especially for children. It's amazing where we can find silent inequities in daily life when we're aware.

9. Speaking both English and French. Sometimes I forget that it's not something everyone can do.

10. My uncanny ability to remember names, phone numbers and birthdays. I may lose my purse, but I can remember all of my elementary school friends parents' phone numbers and their birthdays. Without the help of Facebook. And word for word conversations. It drives my husband nuts.


After a crappy week, Eco Yogini's post made me smile.....and helped to put things in perspective. Yes, I'm very distracted lately, my brain circuits are overloaded, hence losing my purse, but that doesn't make me stupid. Which is how I felt when I realized in my distracted state, having left my purse at a store, and recovering the purse minus my iPod and brand new iPhone and some money. Stupid. And an expensive mistake. But it was a mistake, we all make them. And in the end, it's just stuff. Possessions. I got back the purse I love, that my hubs bought for me for Mother's Day last year. That's more important to me than the other stuff. I can replace them (because I am fortunate enough to have a great job and the financial means, that in itself is a huge thing I should be grateful for).

I am much more than my possessions, my physical body and the mistakes that I make.

And I am passing the challenge along. Either comment or write a blog post telling 10 things you like about yourself, and tell 3 friends something you love about them. No physical attributes allowed! It's harder than you think.

I realize how much my professional life defines me as a person. It's time to get a hobby!